What springs to your mind when you think about christmas.
For me its:
Lights, trees, gifts, snow, the fire, nice food, mulled wine, christmas songs, decorations, happiness, cosiness, reds, golds, candles, family, friends and romance.
And that's what I wanted to talk about because really christmas is quite a romantic time
To be honest when it's actually christmas I don't think i'll be too bothered. It's such a happy day with all your family you're not going to pay much attention to whether you've got a bf or not, i'm just concerned when the next scheduled feeding time is!?
But there is just something about christmas, it's just so pretty and magical and romantic I feel like I should have a boyfriend. I see all the couples in town on the weekend and my friends who have guys it just makes me feel really quite lonely sometimes, like "why don't I have that?"
But at the end of the day I do quite academic subjects as college: Biology, Chemistry, Psychology and Geography. And don't get me wrong the people I have met in my classes are all lovely but mostly girls and the guys in there, there may be a chemistry text book between us but that's as far as it goes...
And I don't really get out enough to meet new guys so I'm a bit hard on myself because what do I expect. But i've been single for a year, the ex is in a fully fledged relationship (which never helps)
and I do really, really like someone at the moment but, it's just not happening.
So I guess with everything being so wintery and beautiful i'm feeling the loneliness a little bit more than usual. And I am one of those girls that is better off, not necessarily in a relationship but seeing or dating someone rather than just the single life.
But when getting upset with our relationship status I think we definitely need to assess our situations carefully. For example I beat myself up about being single in a year but how much effort have I actually made to meet new guys in the last year? Very little. And also, I think we get too hung up on what guys want and then suddenly think we're too ugly, too fat, bad fashion sense etc. When really I swear all guys really have is a sixth sense for confidence.
We can't change ourselves to be what guys want because just like differences in you and your best friends "type" all men will be looking for slightly different things. And there will be guys looking for the shy, quite gals the only problem is its most likely to be the shy, quite boys who are less likely to approach you.
And ultimately are you happy with yourself? Would you date you? If the answers no, (as it is with me) then that's a pretty good indication of where to start. Have you ever tried to find something in your room but, you're looking so hard you can't see it and find it in the most obvious place later when you're getting something else. Pretty sure finding a guy is the same.
The minute we accept being single, and realise its just whats going on right now but we are loveable, and cute, and attractive in our own individual way (and of course other people will find us more attractive than we do, you'd be worried if it was the other way round!) then guys will view us as a relaxed single girl, who's available for dates if we're his type and for one guy eventually if he has the courage to ask us out, we will be.
Also, if you're like me and there is someone you like. Make it happen. We can sit here feeling sorry for our singleselves or, we can put ourselves out there, do a little bit of flirting with the guy show we're interested and see if he follows up. Fair enough might get rejected but then its short and sweet and we can move on instead of just sitting there wondering like a lost puppy,
And what's more ridiculous is I know this advice is true yet I fail to practice what I preach. I'm not comfortable with myself and would not date myself in a million years. I also feel if I am going to accept myself then some major changes need to be made first. Which is wrong! Accepting ourselves is hard and you don't need to love yourself to do so and you can still have parts of you which you wish were different but that is natural. Just be settled and true to who you are, start putting yourself in situations where you'll meet new people and if you like someone, show them you're interested (in a lady-like way of course!!) and see what happens.
Anyone have advice for me? Please comment
Don't know how much longer I can take being single!?
Love you all
Peace and Love
xO
